2004-01-16

pet peeves

this morning I'm in a terrible mood after not sleeping on my bed. things are fine between manfriend and me, except I'm ready to pump his veins full of amphetamines and anti-snoring medication.

last night was another L&O (dunt-dunt) fiesta, as we ate our veggie ground beef substitute burritos in front of the TV. the sleeping and snoring began around 9pm. Mr. Snoreypants went to bed around 10:30, while I sat up, jilted, self-pitying and resentful, reading.

when I did go to bed, the rumbling persisted. so much so, I went to sleep on the couch�a futile effort to escape the decibels. so, it was off to the spare bedroom to simmer and stew.

our routine breakfast did not provide my desired processing, though he repeated that he loved me. however, it was more of a defensive offense on his part (I can't help it... I don't do it intentionally) without an acknowledgement that it SUCKS FOR ME.

after I got him to agree that he'd be pissed if I was out with my friends night after night from 9:00 until bedtime, he lost any ground gained by answering my "I just want my boyfriend here" lament with a "you think I'm not here?" he was so close to making me feel like I was heard.

I know it's not a personal attack, but his passive, take-no-control, deal-with-it, I-was-there-beside-you,-you-left-me-alone-in-bed bullshit pisses me off. why do I bother coming home early from work, giving him backrubs, exhiling myself from a social life?

my beloved is worse than a greedy little puppy: he sucks up all my attention and wants everything on his terms.

puppies aren't the best conversationalists, nor do they go out of their way to improve your life.

guess I'm not a dog person.

earlier - later